Miranda
Highlight Bits & Quotes
12Jason Momoa's Urinal Rider
Ditto shares exclusive celebrity gossip from the set of the A24 indie film 'Nuts for Sale,' claiming Jason Momoa has a specific rider requiring a Star Wagon equipped with a urinal for his bowel movements.
"Jason Momoa shits in urinals. I mean, that's something I know."
"I'm taking a shovel and I'm taking that shit out of the urinals. That's what I'm about."
The California Chicken Cafe Crisis
Miranda recounts a high-stakes delivery where she had to swerve through traffic like a cop to force a food truck to pull over so she could finish an order of Caesar wraps and avoid calling 'grace' for lunch.
"I made this woman who was driving the CCC truck, I said, 'Pull the fuck over!'"
"It's like a ballet dance on the 405."
Nepotism and the Popcorn Chef Dream
The PAs discuss their successful fathers (including Billy Crystal and the 'Riverdance Gods') and Cynthia reveals her true ambition: to become a 'popcorn chef' who pops non-corn items like onions and jerky.
"Do you know what it's like to have Billy Crystal as your dad?"
"I'm talking about the fundamental corn itself."
The Body is a Prison (and a Chair)
Kyle (Ditto) reveals his secret past as a Riverdancer and his current existential dread regarding the human body, leading to his preference for playing inanimate objects like chairs in major motion pictures.
"Our body is our prison."
"I was the Christopher Plummer big chair. You guys remember that chair?"
New Goals and Toxic PAs
The group abandons their current career paths for new goals like becoming movie stars or therapists, while acknowledging their toxic reputations on set.
"I'm this bag of garbage that got hot."
"It's like talking to a freaking mop, always wet and down."
The Frappuccino Placebo Effect
Miranda reveals that the 'coffee' she brings the petite blondes after their gravity-reset naps are actually just Starbucks milkshakes with zero caffeine.
"A Frappuccino doesn't have any coffee in it."
"So we've been waking up from our naps all by placebo?"
The Great Potomac Rescue of Joe Biden
The PAs recount the time they saved President Joe Biden from the Potomac River using Postmates salad boxes as flotation devices while he was consulting on their film.
"Joe Biden's got some chompers, man. He locks in like a pit bull."
Nepo-Baby PAs and Their Famous Fathers
The PAs reveal their high-profile lineage, claiming fathers like Samuel Goldwyn, Billy Crystal, Michael Bay, and Michael Flatley, the Lord of the Dance.
"My dad is actually Michael Bay."
Al Pacino Plays a Building
The PAs describe the technical difficulties of a film where Al Pacino was cast as a building, requiring 50,000 apple boxes to achieve the proper scale.
"He was playing a building, and Chris Evans was playing just a dude."
Robotics and International Children
Trick explains his failed attempt to turn his car into a Transformer using YouTube tutorials hosted by international children.
"All I want to do is make my car a big yellow guy who talks to me."
Let the President Swim
The PAs receive a text to return to set but consider abandoning their duties to the President to pursue their true passions.
"Let the president swim."
The Nation's Most Important Production Assistants
The hosts introduce four PAs who claim to be the most important in the country, having received White House surveys and Purple Hearts for their service on a film set.
"We got invited here because we're four of the nation's most important PAs."