Mimi Spaghetti
A star of screen who moved to the stage to play 'Young Dame' in the revival.
Highlight Bits & Quotes
11The Accountant's Physical Shutdown
The cast describes the unprecedented physical closing of the show by a vomiting accountant who chained himself to the theater doors and hired armed guards to prevent the actors from performing.
"It was the first show on Broadway ever closed physically by the accountant."
"If we approach the doors, we've been told they will shoot us on sight."
The 'Come On Flalalady' Chant
The cast peer-pressures Flalalady Guggenheim into performing a 'tumble' she has been practicing, leading to a chaotic rhythmic chant that eventually lifts their spirits.
"Come on Flalalady, come on please. With just a thumbs up, you could do it."
"I haven't seen her this energetic since she accidentally took my Adderall when she mistook it for her Percocet."
Scapparelli's Breakdown and the Gun Reveal
After a tragic phone call revealing his family has died, Scapparelli Frank has a breakdown. The tension escalates into a standoff where both he and Flalalady Guggenheim reveal they are carrying firearms.
"I own a gun."
"I do too."
The Mayor of Boston and Slime Tutorials
Mimi Spaghetti discusses her role as the Mayor of Boston, a fancy British equivalent to the Mayor of Easttown. The group then watches a 'slime tutorial' (a bootleg musical recording) of her freezing up during her first preview.
"I played the mayor of Boston who's sort of a fancy British equivalent of the mayor of Easttown."
The Disastrous 'Diary of a Dame' Preview
The cast reviews the chaotic first preview of their musical, which involved a 'ladder domino' stunt gone wrong and a person from the audience being cast after screaming 'the subway' at a critical moment.
"The ladder domino, the song about how dominoes keep falling in New York City."
The Orchestra Incident and Angry New Yorkers
Scapparelli Frank explains how a rehearsal outside the theater led to a flood of angry New Yorkers kicking the cast into the orchestra pit because they accidentally released a swarm of strong rats while tap dancing.
"It turns out you were releasing rats. These rats had been sleeping, and you were scattering them throughout."
The Five Stages of a Show Closing
Dan Maroon outlines the five stages of a Broadway show closing, which include 'Curtain Falls', 'Heart Falls', and the pragmatic 'Bank Account Falls'.
"Instead of mind falls, bank account falls. Kaching!"
Plugging The Meat Skeleton
Scapparelli Frank plugs his social media handle and his real-life podcast while the rest of the cast waves goodbye to the audience in a chaotic sign-off.
"You can find me at the meet skeleton or you can listen to my podcast One of us with Finn and Chris."
The Improvised Disclaimer
A formal-sounding voiceover provides the show's credits and a legal disclaimer, humorously noting that the performers are 'stupid' and their opinions don't reflect anyone's reality.
"The opinions expressed on this podcast do not reflect the opinions of anyone who works on it, not even the performers, because this is an improvised podcast and we're stupid."
Diary of a Dame vs. Diary of a Wimpy Kid
The cast discusses the confusing creative direction of their show, which allegedly pivoted from Anne Frank's diary to 'Diary of a Wimpy Kid' mid-production.
The Immediate Aftermath of a Broadway Closing
The cast is in shock, frantically texting agents and family members to cancel plans or reclaim living spaces after their show, 'Diary of a Dame', is abruptly shut down by an accountant.
"Tell Diana it's time to close the relationship again."
"I'm not going to call the police. I think I was just experiencing a moment of inflated ego."
"The shed can no longer be used as an Airbnb. I will be using it as my studio again."