Samantha Bowl aka Witch Titch
sister of SheEdgar SheAllan ShePoe
Highlight Bits & Quotes
11Skeleton Brimblebones: Tim Burton's Muse
Skeleton Brimblebones recounts her time living in Tim Burton's Burbank apartment and how being abandoned for 16 weeks inspired her triple-platinum poem about a goblin.
"I lived in Tim Burton's apartment in Burbank for a long time."
"Goblin, goblin, high and mighty, oh my god I've got a frighty."
"I've never been scared by a cookie."
"Next week your hard work will be for naught because you'll be offed."
Witch Titch's Candy Lore
Witch Titch reads a poem about 'Mr. Snickers' and the Nestle corporation, leading to a dark tangent about Nestle's water rights.
"Mr. Snickers is here. Is he treating or tricking?"
"Research why Nestle sells water. Terrifying."
"The Skittle references virginity."
"Streaming took over Valentine's poetry and they basically throttled it."
Trojan Horsing Poetry into Active Shooter Drills
Bloody Guthrie reveals he makes money by booking elementary school assemblies under the guise of active shooter drills to 'Trojan Horse' in his folk poetry.
"I promote it as a shelter-in-place active shooter drill assembly to teach children."
"Skeletor-in-place, right?"
"Underneath it all is a soul, and what is a soul but an idea that haunts your bones?"
"It's an ugly bird that says breathe, and I was trying to remind myself to breathe, but the problem is I can never see it."
Mummy Bo Number Five
Michelin Star performs a Halloween-themed parody of Mambo No. 5 titled 'Mummy Bo Number Five,' featuring frantic last-minute lyrical revisions.
"A little bit of Boo-a all night long."
"I just realized a spookier word. It's not sun, it's moon."
"Nothing spookier than three X's in a row."
Witch Titch and the She-Edgar Legacy
Witch Titch introduces herself and her famous sister, She-Edgar She-Po, discussing their family legacy in Halloween poetry and her sister's upcoming 'Hallow-Barbenheimer' film project.
"She-Edgar She-Po is my older sister."
"I have an old soul and an old mouth."
Michelin Star: The Kendrick Lamar of Halloween Rap
Michelin Star defends his inclusion on the poetry panel as a rapper, claiming a poetic approach and revealing he gets paid exclusively in Halloween Horror Nights merchandise to avoid IRS audits.
"I'm a Michelin Star Halloween rapper."
"Legally speaking, we cannot be audited."
Rupi Scar's Existential Bedtime Poetry
Rupi Scar reads a terrifyingly emotional poem about a ghost leaving a girl in bed, revealing that he also illustrates Goosebumps covers using a single-line technique.
"You're a ghost, I'm a girl."
"I want to terrify people on an existential level."
Starburst of a Dead Body
Samantha Bowl pitches her new brand deal with Starburst for a Halloween flavor where the only difference is that the pink candy is 'darker pink,' which the others insist is just red.
"I'm doing a deal with Starburst. Starburst of a dead body."
"The pink is a little darker. (That's red.) No, just a little darker pink."
The Exquisite Corpse Halloween Poem
The poets attempt a collaborative 'Exquisite Corpse' poem, resulting in a disjointed mess about ghosts, family-sized candy, and shaking winds, ending in an emotional breakdown of gratitude.
"Family size or fun size, that I won't knowst."
"Thank you so much man, because I wasn't going to be able to come up with one!"
The Skeleton's Final Warning
The group interviews the decorative skeleton in the tree, who delivers a gravelly-voiced rhyming warning to teenagers before the hosts sign off for 'Hallowood.'
"When you're just a mere teen, watch out for dead-o pile of bones and Happy Halloween!"
The Top 10 Halloween Poets of 2024
The hosts introduce the niche industry of Halloween Poets, celebrating their inclusion on Variety's prestigious Top 10 list, despite the magazine only having the budget to interview five of them at a time.
"Variety just announced their 2024 list of Halloween poets."
"It's crazy they never sit down with all 10 of us, they just do five at a time."