Chanse McCrary
Guest1 episodeChanse McCrary (he/him) is an American comedian, actor and improviser. He is most notable to this wiki for appearing as Teagan in Singing Waiters (with Chanse McCrary).
Characters
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Highlight Bits
10The Renaissance of Burger: Meet the Cast
The hosts introduce a group of singing waiters from the famous Time Square restaurant 'Wish Upon a Burger,' who discuss the intense culture of brunch shifts and the health benefits of 'gluten-filled' diets.
"It's like a break check for your body."
"Openers do everything. Closers do nothing."
"It's the renaissance of burger."
The Smash Burger Featuring Megan Hilty
Teagan reveals his role in creating the restaurant's musical-themed menu items, including the 'Smash Burger featuring Megan Hilty and Katharine McPhee' and 'Soupsicle the Musical.'
"Would you like green chicken with your Green Witches?"
"It's Soupsicle the Musical of the day."
"Money on the table and not tips."
The Forever-Sicle: A Musical That Never Ends
Sam Kelly pitches her original musical concept where the show never stops and loops back to the middle, casting Teagan as the lead solely because he 'saw active combat.'
"What if a musical never stopped?"
"A forever-sicle? That sounded like a threat."
"Tegan, it's you. You literally saw active combat."
The Hard Knock Life of a Singing Waiter
The group discusses the physical toll of performing 'Annie' numbers at Wish Upon a Burger. Dinah reveals her 'cauliflower' knees, which she claims are a result of aging out of the orphan role but refusing to stop the choreography.
"You might know me as the Broadway Babbler on TikTok."
"I bus in from New Hampshire every morning."
"I gave Jessica the Gazelle gonorrhea."
"They look like cauliflower!"
The Ensemble Bell and the Nixon Mic
The waiters describe the complex logistics of the 'ensemble bell,' which requires all tables to tip simultaneously. They also discuss their ornate, bubble-shooting microphone nicknamed 'The Nixon.'
"In my generation, we called him the Nixon."
"Every single table needs to tip at the same time to get the ensemble to go."
"It shoots bubbles out of the bottom every time you sing."
Dark Web Broadway Rumors
Buzzy shares a disturbing rumor from the dark web regarding Jamie Campbell Bower being a nine-month-old baby. The group discusses the smooth skin of actors and the reliability of 'Reddit r/BroadwayNews.'
"There's a rumor that Jamie Campbell Bower is a 9-month-old baby."
"I read it on the dark web."
"That's why his skin is so smooth."
The Parfait Soliloquy and Cellblock Mango Margarita
Teagan describes a lonely morning opening shift involving a piano and a parfait, while Dinah pitches a Chicago-inspired monologue to be performed while serving drinks.
"Don't rain on my parfait."
"Cellblock mango margarita."
"Is your big number a showstopper or is it a tearjerker?"
Colorblind Casting: Run and Tell BLT
Teagan explains the concept of colorblind casting, leading to a Hairspray parody about bacon, lettuce, avocado, and tomato performed by an all-white cast.
"Run and tell BLAT: Bacon, Lettuce, Avocado, Tomato."
"The blacker the berry, the bacony the bacon."
The Shoe Crisis of the 80s: Harry Gets Cobbled
Dinah reveals her tragic backstory: her husband Harry went for smokes and was 'cobbled' into a giant shoe by a Times Square Elmo, a common 80s New York hazard.
"He got cobbled by a Times Square Elmo."
"They turned my husband into a big shoe."
"The shoe crisis ripped through New York City in the 80s."
Sweeney Todd: The Fry-Hand Finale
The group performs a medley of Sweeney Todd parodies including 'These Are My Fries' and 'I Feel You, Linguini,' culminating in a chaotic shootout and a Rent-inspired revival.
"These are my fries, see how they glisten."
"I feel you, Linguini!"
"525,600 burgers!"