Emily Movies attempts to fulfill a sponsorship requirement by asking the panel for their 'messy life moments' that they made clean with Clorox.
"How do you Clorox clean? As in, what was a messy life in your moment that you made clean?"
"My messy moment was when my father was on his deathbed."
"I went home and bleached my sink and toilet. And I felt better with Clorox."
The panel introduces their various niche media outlets, ranging from YouTube's Extra Extra Extra to the hyper-local East Hollywood Reporter which only covers a two-block radius.
"Extra Extra Extra is YouTube's version of Extra."
"I work for the East Hollywood Reporter, where we cover everything from the Los Feliz 3 to the Vista."
"It's like being a Marine and then going to Iraq because you're a fan of fighting."
Stylist Darius Walker reveals his secret to affordable high fashion: a staff of three-year-olds who work for packs of gum and are currently in creative control of his preschool-oriented aesthetic.
"This year I've got a staff of all three-year-olds, and their fashion instincts are impeccable."
"They work for a pack of gum, so they're really affordable."
"Let the glue dry, you know what I mean?"
Luciano Gorgonzola explains his habit of visiting celebrity homes as a fan, establishing a rigid gender binary where houses are women and apartments are men.
"Houses are ladies, apartments are men. Everybody knows that."
"The house was wearing a lovely dress made from Spain."
"Spain is a great fabric for houses."
Emily Movies attempts to force a viral marketing moment for Clorox by asking the panel to share their 'messy' life stories that they eventually 'cleaned' with bleach.
"How do you Clorox clean? As in what was a messy life in your moment that you made clean?"
"My messy moment was when my father was on his deathbed and I asked him, 'Does he love you?' and he just looked away and died."
"I killed it with Clorox."
The panel of red carpet correspondents introduces themselves, including a stylist who employs toddlers and a reporter who only covers two blocks of East Hollywood.
"I'm Mama Junior and I work at Extra Extra Extra."
"I work for the East Hollywood Reporter, where we cover everything from the Los Feliz 3 to the Vista."
Grey Gray describes the East Hollywood Reporter's five-hour printed blooper reel event where readers flip pages in unison to experience mishaps like the accidental printing of his home address.
"We all agree to flip at the same time, flip pages at the same time."
"Thus Airbnb was born."
Grey Gray reveals he was a pallbearer for Bette Davis by tapping out her nephew, while Mama Junior explains how she launched her career by interviewing mourners at Shirley Temple's funeral.
"Out of the way, out of the way, someone with real shoulders coming through."
"I'm going to show up to work like I have one and wait for someone to come in and hire me."
Emily Movies reboots her system while Grey Gray recounts being literally shot by Annette Bening on a red carpet, resulting in a kidney loss that no one in Hollywood would help with.
"I have to reboot myself every 20 minutes."
"Annette Bening pulled out a gun on me!"
Grey Gray defends his two-block beat, claiming the newspaper will burst into flames if read by anyone from Culver City.
"A reporter who refuses to read. Well, that is East Hollywood."
Luciano Gorgonzola discusses his polyamorous lifestyle, which currently involves dating a bungalow in Atwater Village.
"I'm dating this lovely little bungalow in Atwater."
Luciano Gorgonzola explains his hobby of stalking celebrity homes, leading to a debate on the binary gender of architecture where houses are female and apartments are male.
"Lady? Houses are ladies, apartments are men. Everybody knows that."
Stylist Darius Walker reveals his secret to success: a staff of three-year-olds who work for sugar bursts and juice-filled gum.
